Before I say anything else, many congrats to Kate on being married! The wedding was awesome!
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I apologize in advance for any typos. One of the many nice things that Kate did during her wedding weekend (thank you!) was arrange for several of us to get manicures and pedicures. I got some pretty, pretty fake nails, and it's practically impossible to type with the things.
I've been thinking about what I posted in my Change List, about the things I want to work on the most. A couple are in the personality department (not being shy, along with something I'm not quite ready for people to know yet) and the other is that little mention of never having written a novel. I think I'll explain the last one first.
I love writing. It has always been a passion of mine. Literally, always. I've been weaving stories together in my head for as long as I can remember, and thanks to my bizarre memory I can remember all the way back to my second birthday. Or was it third? Either way, there was a tasty Dalmatian cake involved and I've been inventing random tales pretty much as long as I've had conscious thought. Most of them are little wisps of things. Blurbs. Scenes. Individual characters that have nowhere to go. There is one story, however, that has been building up in my head since the late years of middle school and it's dying to get out.
It's an amazing story. Sometimes I go through all of the things involved and surprise myself with the sheer size of this world I've created. I know exactly how I'll arrange the novels (yes, more than one. It'll take that many to get the whole thing down) if I ever get around to writing them. I've invented races, and cultures, and landscapes that blow my own mind. It needs to get down on paper. The story needs to be told. But everytime I go to write it, my mind freezes. I have to find some way to work through that because this is truly epic, and all the imaginative people out there deserve to see it too. Really. Epic. Think Lord of the Rings + Avatar + H. P. Lovecraft with a nice heavy dash of me thrown in. If you would like a tiny sample (very tiny) go to my deviantART gallery. The things in the Adalus and Karr section take place in that world.
But enough with the thing I want to do. Here's something I've done. I told that shy little part of me to shut up and scram, and I went out and danced for several hours. In front of my parents. I think I shocked a lot of people, because they kept coming up to me afterwards to tell me that I'm a good dancer and that there were even more people talking about me. Letting that little bit of me have free reign without being held back and then having people give me the very opposite of strange looks felt good.
I think that's the way I'm going to go about things. A little bit at a time, slowly easing into it. That's the way I'm going to go with that other secret thing, too. I do want people to know about that, but not yet. I'll build up to it. I think if there's less of a shock when I do say it, or if people figure it out on their own, it'll be less stressful for everybody, especially me. But this is one of those secrets that really shouldn't have to be secret, it just happens to be controversial and I happen to be shy. And I'll leave you with that hint before I completely give it away before I'm ready to.
Alright, not quite. I deserve commendations for typing all of this with plastic thingies glued to the ends of my fingers! That was hard!